Thursday, November 04, 2010

I am not failing. More postponing rather.

Okay, so, I swore I was going to post everyday for the month of November. But the past two days I have had nothing interesting to write about. I mean, the night before last I could have posted photos of some vintage bags I like on etsy and last night I honestly contemplated posting about the 27 emails in my inbox that I have sent to myself in order to not forget about a website or an article or an art project.


What I suppose I can write about and have thought about writing about is the current state my life is in. Which is pretty much fantastic. More so than ever. And it's only going to get better. (as long as my health exam goes well next week and I pay off my debt :D)

I was never one to think about the future. The word in itself was always so benign to me. When I think back I don't think it ever really registered in my brain. I hate those surveys that ask, "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" I never knew the answer. I never had the slightest idea.

All of this has changed for me though. All of it. I have never wanted to embrace my future so much. It doesn't scare me anymore. Well, maybe a little but more in the sense of being nervous and anxious and restless waiting for it to begin.

Now, my future is bright. It's there. It exists and has promise. And hope.

And I really hate to be cliche and say this huge change is all due to a guy. Because it is. But when it actually happens to you, when you find that one person that feels the same feelings and wants the same future .. It isn't a lame cliche. It's how your life was always supposed to go and you had no idea that was how and why and where.

My future .. Our future, gives me purpose. It gets me out of bed in the morning. It forces me to work hard and think positively and make plans in my head and on paper.

So how has this come about with me finding this path and yet not being able to start it yet? Well, I live in Seattle and my boyfriend lives in Cincinnati. It will be like this for at least the next year. Unless I get too restless in the Spring. But shh ..

Our first photo together ..


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