Friday, July 31, 2009

My life according to Jack White

Pick your Artist:
Jack White songs from The White Stripes, The Raconteurs, and The Dead Weather

Are you a male or female:
You're Pretty Good Looking For A Girl

Describe yourself:
You Don't Understand Me

How do you feel:
I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself 

Describe where you currently live:
St. James Infirmary Blues

If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Hotel Yorba

Your favorite form of transportation:
New Pony

Your best friend?
Consoler Of The Lonely

You and your best friends are:
It's True That We Love One Another

What's the weather like?
Yellow Sun

Favorite time of day:
In The Cold, Cold Night

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:
It's My Fault For Being Famous

Your relationship:
A Martyr For My Love For You

What is life to you:
Wasting My Time

Your fear:
Walking With A Ghost

What is the best advice you have to give:
Truth Doesn't Make A Noise

Thought for the Day:
Stop Breaking Down

How I would like to die:
One More Cup Of Coffee (the lyrics say more than the title)

My soul's present condition:
The Hardest Button To Button

My motto:
Cash Grab Complications On The Matter

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Slowly but surely ..

A piece here, a piece there .. it is all coming together. 

I really don't know where to begin .. I am not going to explain everything but just say that I am finally seeing a light at the end of this long, dreary tunnel. 

It was so hot today. Every part of my body where the skin isn't exposed is covered with a layer of sweat between it and whatever is over it. Clothing, other body parts, the couch, the floor, an animal, whatever I am knitting. Yes, I am knitting in the heat of July. I have to start stock piling for the winter so I can finally open my etsy shop. 

I am finally able to eat without being nauseated. Which in a way is a bummer, I was sort of saving money on food and I think I lost a couple of pounds. But I had to stop living in denial and started eating yogurt and drinking kombucha and now the tummy is back to normal. 

Why have I let it go this far? Why have I allowed myself to feel this way? It has consumed my every waking moment to the point where I was no longer making rational decisions. And I don't even know why. Was it out of love or possessiveness? 

At one point, I had made some wise crack about his new and improved life. He replied stating his life isn't new and improved. More recently I was thinking about what I had said and discovered that my life is new and improved and I have been too busy wallowing to even notice. 

I am very fortunate to have my job which I am very fluent at and am managed by someone that has much confidence in me. I live in a new, diverse neighborhood with fucking awesome neighbors (fucking awesome), as a result of said neighborhood I am MUCH closer to my friends and have been able to rebuild friendships and get to know them in ways I never realized I didn't know them (Love you, Ellen), I have been able to build bonds with people that I had none with and find out there really are people out there that care and want to help in times of need (i.e., Jack, Brandy, Nicole .. A-mazing people). I have been spending more time with my family, god, I love them. Including my Dad, which is crazy. I have great school opportunities and see the potential for lots of art and creating and photos .. The possibilities are endless. 

I know there is more, that is all that I could come up with off the top of my head. 

I was never dying .. But I'm gonna live.